What is Mormon Assault Vehicle?
1.
another term for a station wagon, mini-van, or any other kind of vehicle that is targeted at the "family" demographic(also M.A.V.)
"Tactical advantages aside, the M.A.V. is top of the line for the holy warrior troop transport manufactured by the Church of Latter Day Saints Military Industrial Complex. Also great for family trips...to heathen lands."
2.
Any vehicle whose express purpose is carrying 8 or more children at the same time, with groceries.
The Mormon Assault Vehicle of choice is the Chevy Suburban, but don't count out Explorers, Expeditions, Grand Caravans and 16 passenger Econoline vans.
Yo, did you see that? That Mormon Assault Vehicle almost cracked us!
Pay attention bitch!
See
3.
Commonly Called a MAV.
A tipical MAV is a
Usually gets less than ten miles per gallon when fully loaded with children.
To spot a MAV, simple look at the driver. Is she a woman? Is her hair done up, is she wearing makeup? Does she have those fucking half see-through shiny silver glasses? Is you said yes to these, you have successfuly spotted a MAV.
A MAV may come equipped with some of the folowing items, this is how you can tell its being driven by one hip-ass mom:
Rims
Spinners
Tinted Windows
Spoilers
After market Xenon lights
Note: 99% of the time trucks are NOT MAV's, as they are usually driven by men and cannot hold many children. Crew cabs are an exception!
These damn women driving their MAVs, get off your fucking cell phone so you dont fucking hit me!
Damn, check out the
milf in the MAV!
4.
A large van or SUV used to haul many people - usually children. Frequently 15 passenger vans these "tanks" are seen headed to school, grocery store, soccer games, baseball games, hockey games, youth activities, church, etc... and then to home all in one day. Some times mistaken for Polyg (said pol lig) Rigs commonly associated with "fundamentalist mormons" who have no association to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Son: Look at that huge van Mommy is that a Mormon Assault Vehicle?
Mom: No dear thats just a Soccer Mom who has too much money and not enough sense to drive an earth friendly vehicle.
Son: But why are Mormon Assault Vehicles ok - don't they ruin the environment too?
Mom: Because they actually use all of the seats so their ppp (pollution per person) rate is actually very low. They breed like rabbits so its more economically feasible to have a large vehicle. Now finish up your Mickey D's and lets hop in our rice burner to get to Wally's World.
See
