Muffin Men

What is Muffin Men?


1.

Upperclassmen (usually rowers) who tend to spend a lot of time obsessing about the freshmen girls at their school. They are usually low class, unintelligent, and have big noses. Barely anyone likes them, even as friends. Ostracized from their Jewish communities because of their loserishness, the only reason they prey on the younger girls is because the women their own age want nothing to do with them. Muffin Men think they're all that in a rowing unitard, but are pretty much as attractive as a 90 year old man in a speedo.

Freshman Girl 1: Ugh, you'd better watch out...the muffin man's coming.

Freshman Girl 2: I know! He's on the crew team, and is creepishly facebook stalking me!

Freshman Girl 1: Are you serious? Me too!

Muffin Man: Want me to butter your muffin's, girls?

Freshman Girls 1 & 2: No thanks, asswipe. Go back to your group of Muffin Men and pick on someone your own size!

See crew, loser, dick, ass, whoremonger


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