Newspaper Edit Meaning

1.

A homeless person's blanket.

Tyrone prefers the LA Times newspaper to the Daily News newspaper to keep himself warm at night.

See newspaper, homeless, news, paper, blanket, 47

2.

An instrument aiding the execution of the common house fly.

damnit its another fucking fly ruining my general eating experience, here pass me that newspaper...*big chase ensues* WHAP... damn straight its dead.*picks smeared remains up off cupboard door*

See newspaper, weapon, fly, doom, death

3.

1. A pastime for people while taking a shit.

2. To read the newspaper is a euphemism for taking a shit.

Oh crap...hold on, guys, I gotta go read the newspaper.

*toilet water splashes*

See toilet, bathroom stall, dump, newspaper job, crap

4.

A publication that an attractive woman under the age of 40 does not read.

Hot chicks don't read the newspaper; unless they're looking at the Macy's ad.