Nice Guy Edit Meaning

1.

A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.

The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”

The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.

The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”

"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."

"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."

See nice guy, jocks, idiots, suckers

2.

A male who can't get a girlfriend, never mind get laid, because he DOESN'T treat women like shit.

Bud is a 21 year old vergin because he's a nice guy.

See D

3.

A man who you can call late at night just because you're looking for someone to talk to. He would never speak ill of anyone, never harm a person unless absolutely necessary, never cheat and is always honest. Will help you move just because you're friends and doesn't ask for favors in return. Isn't sleazy and wouldn't take advantage of a person in a drunken or mourning state.

Often times, this nice guy doesn't have a girlfriend because women usually go for jerks and just make friends with the nice guy.

Pity for him, don't you think?

4.

A man who has rejected the societal notion of masculinity and chosen to define himself from the inside out instead, realising that traits such as empathy and nuturing are not actually limited to the female of the species, and nor are aggression and assertiveness limited to the male.

Despite this newfound revelation, however, there is still a strong genetic predisposition for humans to continuously behave as if we were animals seeking out the alpha male with those genes most suited for surviving in a hostile environment.

Often times, the average woman, whom society encourages to indulge in her weaknesses and surpress her strengths, is a self-loathing masochist who may appreciate the nice guy's friendship and understanding, but feels no attraction toward him because his insecurities remind her of why she hates herself. Therefore, she almost always seeks the dominant, aggressive, unempathic male with whom she can vicariously live to make up for her weaknesses. Of course, this inidividual, commonly known as a jerk, is also usually an egotistical, disloyal, and shallow person for whom societal dictates of masculinity will force him to disregard his mate's feelings and treat her as if she were beneath him.

Feeling emotionally unsatisfied, the female will then turn to her nice guy friend, whom she has long since castrated, for comfort, and complain to him about how men suck, except for him, and that he deserves a good girlfriend eventually except that it is never her or any other woman he might encounter.

I'm a Nice Guy? Fuck You!

See Killing Kittens

5.

the person every girl will compare their would-be boyfriends to, for they possess every trait a woman desires. However, for whatever reason, women avoid them like the plague.

"I'd never date Jimmy in a million years, but he sure is a nice guy"

6.

1. The man women call when there bitch-ass boyfriends treat them like shit, but they would never date because they are "too nice."

2. The "real men" who were always there for the women that they love, but always hear the following phrase. "Sure, (insert ex-boyfriend's name here) was a total jerk and cheater, but I wanna give it another try." See unrequited.

3. The guy in the office/classroom who catches shit from everybody, but still helps everybody out when they need him. Also, slow to anger.

Girl: I hate(insert ex-boyfriend's name here) because he cheated on me with my mom.

Nice Guy:Forget him. Why don't me and you just go out for dinner?

Girl: Just as friends, though. I'm gonna give it another try with (insert ex-boyfriend's name here)

Nice Guy: *vomits violently*

EXAMPLE #2

Everybody in Office/Classroom: Haha, look at (insert nice guy's name here.)

Supervisor/ Teacher: Somebody has to stay late to work on this project.

Everybody in Office/ Classroom: *making up various bullshit excuses*

Nice Guy: Fine, even though I was supposed to be on a cruise this afternoon, I'll stay late.

7.

always finishes last

nice guys finish last

See pupil