On The John

What is On The John?

1.

A euphemism for "taking a shit" or "in the process of excreting fecal matter out of one's anus." Johnis a synonym for toilet.

FBIagent: "We have reason to believe there is an imminent terrorist threat on American soil. We need the assistance of special agent Jack Bauerimmediately."

Tony: "Sorry, he's on the john right now. Try again in 10-15 minutes."

(from bathroom) ***PFFFT! PFFFFFFFFFT! EEEEUUUUGH! PLOP!***

FBI agent: "Oh man that doesn't sound good at all."

Tony: "Yeah, he had a super carnitas burrito with extra beans and hot sauce for lunch."

FBI agent: "Well that explains it.....Hey, wait a minute! This is 24. Nobody ever goes to the bathroom on this show. Or eats, sleeps, or showers for that matter. It would hurt our ratings if we showed such mundane daily activities."

Tony: "Hey, when you've gotta go you've gotta go."

See shit, poop, dump, crap, feces, fecal matter, fecal festival, fire at the feces, beer shits, plop, Nick D
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