What is Orwellian Historian?
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Someone who erases the past to fit their vision of the present. From the George Orwell novel '1984'.
Why dwell on your sad childhood memories? Just have a orwellian historian take your unhappy pictures and home movies and have them destroyed. Then you block them out of your mind for good.
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With your girl in the position of an American Football Center, you put your hands under her butt. She shits in your hands you take a 1 ..