What is Parkes?
1.
An organism which travels at very slow velocity.
The limit of a function that describes the velocity at which the organism can traverse from point A to point B, as time approaches infinity.
In most cases the organism won't even reach point B.
As the function of the organism approaches infinity, it will intersect many normal human organisms traversing at a much higher velocities, and reaching point B before the organism.
Biological studies have been done on the organism to find out why it cannot travel faster, often by dissecting it. However this method is extremely hard, as the organism contains a multi layer of lipids surrounding its body.
Scientific results show that usually the organism tends to expire before it reaches its destination, and needs more oxygen to walk faster.
Chemical studies have tried to calculate this amount of oxygen in moles, assuming at first, that the organism was like most other species that live on earth, but it was found that even the most advanced and efficient computers are not able to computate such a high number. Thermodynamic experts, who are aware of the fact that the universe will ultimately end in a state of equilibrium due to entropy, predict that the number of years that the universe will have to live will be much less ever since this organism has come about into the world.
Alien theorists like to use this organism to prove their ideas that aliens do indeed exist on Earth, but their proofs are unable to explain this organism of such large scale managed to enter the Earth's atmosphere in such an unnoticable way.
Despite all appearance, DNA studies shows the organism (believe it or not) is indeed human (even though the DNA was extremely hard to extract since the nucleus was being squished by all the adipose in the cells).
Due to this recent information, anthropologists began looking at the organism, trying to find human qualities about it. They discovered that it did not have a displeasing personality, although its brain power is definitely lacking and its intelligence level is very low.
Despite all appearances, it has left all human being speechless by its uncanny ability to manage to obtain multiple degrees.
Psychologists have discovered certain patterns in its behaviour. It prefers to spent its time in school habitats, which may be due to its lack of knowledge and intelligence. It seems to be hungrily for knowledge. However, most humans who are in daily contact with it, would agree that it is in fact trying to hinder others from increasing their own intelligence, in hopes that the whole world will become just as stupid as it is.
This mysterious organism provides much speculation and amusement for other human beings.
"Did you hear about that earthquake? Parkes must have walked there."
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