What is Pear In The Mixed Fruit Bowl?


1.

n., A personality type; one who is small or otherwise unobtrusive, and also bland, usually white, and kind of a square.

Derived from the thoroughly unexciting pears found in portable, lunch-pack bowls of mixed fruit sold by Dole, Del Monte, and supermarket knockoffs.

All his life, Mikey B. wanted to be dramatic and exciting. He cranked his techno albums to maximum volume, and rolled down his windows while cruising the boulevards of his parents' wealthy neighborhood. He once organized a crunkbake sale, for his high school chapter of Young Republicans (who had not yet co-opted the word, hyphyfrom hip, urban culture).

Yet, try as he might, nobody really noticed him. He was just a pear in the mixed fruit bowl of teenage society- small, white, bland, and kind of squarish.

See square, bland, dull, boring, milquetoast


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