Pillow Barrier Edit Meaning

1.

Ostensibly a sex-prevention device, the Pillow Barrier is simply a cushion strategically placed by the female partner in order to prevent physical contact during sleeping hours. Quite often, the male eroneously believes he is cuddling an arm or breast, only to wake up and discover that a pillow was the object of his affections.

Yesterday morning, while my girlfriend was at work, I unintentionally ejaculated all over her pillow barrier; I then allowed a lactating cat to spill milk all over it - that was before I gave the dizzy kitten a gentle squeeze, whereby he shat and pissed on it. And she still kept the barrier there last night - evidently, I smell worse...