What is Quick Fix?
1.
A shabby attempt at correcting a problem, which usually leads to bigger problems that could have been easily avoided by doing the job right the first time.
Problem: The condom broke.
Quick fix: Get down there and try to suck it out.
New problem: You just swallowed a bunch of jizz, you cum-guzzling idiot, and she's pregnant anyway.
Better idea: Give her the morning-after pill.
Problem: Too many ducks in your yard.
Quick fix: Use duck tape, thinking the ducks should be attracted to it.
New problem: Kids in the neighborhood used it to tape your son to a tree naked.
Better idea: Shoot those damn ducks with a sawed-off shotgun. That'll teach 'em.
Problem: You want a liter of cola. Not a 20-ounce bottle, not a 44-ounce big gulp, a fucking liter.
Quick fix: Jump over the counter, attack that burger punk, and start a crazy big mac-throwing riot.
New problem: That's assault, brother. You're in the slammer.
Better idea: Remind the kid that liter is French for "Give me some fucking cola before I break your fucking face!" Don't actually do it though.
Problem: Your arm is trapped under a slab of concrete, and you're starving.
Quick fix: Gnaw it off. That solves both problems.
New problem: You're handicapped and everyone laughs at you.
Better idea: Lift the cinder block off of your arm and walk to McDonald's across the street.
See
2.
An ingenious creation by Spectrum Labs. This synthetic urine will pass any and
all drug tests that the bladder police can throw at you.
Tom used Quick Fix to pass his drug test.
See
1.
A shabby attempt at correcting a problem, which usually leads to bigger problems that could have been easily avoided by doing the job right the first time.
Problem: The condom broke.
Quick fix: Get down there and try to suck it out.
New problem: You just swallowed a bunch of jizz, you cum-guzzling idiot, and she's pregnant anyway.
Better idea: Give her the morning-after pill.
Problem: Too many ducks in your yard.
Quick fix: Use duck tape, thinking the ducks should be attracted to it.
New problem: Kids in the neighborhood used it to tape your son to a tree naked.
Better idea: Shoot those damn ducks with a sawed-off shotgun. That'll teach 'em.
Problem: You want a liter of cola. Not a 20-ounce bottle, not a 44-ounce big gulp, a fucking liter.
Quick fix: Jump over the counter, attack that burger punk, and start a crazy big mac-throwing riot.
New problem: That's assault, brother. You're in the slammer.
Better idea: Remind the kid that liter is French for "Give me some fucking cola before I break your fucking face!" Don't actually do it though.
Problem: Your arm is trapped under a slab of concrete, and you're starving.
Quick fix: Gnaw it off. That solves both problems.
New problem: You're handicapped and everyone laughs at you.
Better idea: Lift the cinder block off of your arm and walk to McDonald's across the street.
See
2.
An ingenious creation by Spectrum Labs. This synthetic urine will pass any and
all drug tests that the bladder police can throw at you.
Tom used Quick Fix to pass his drug test.
See
