What is Rubinoff?
1.
Death in a plastic bottle.
I just took a shot of death and it was called Rubinoff.
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2.
The bottle is plastic so it doesnt shattered when you fall down the stairs drunk off you ass.
Rubinoff Vodka, it rubbin off on YOU!
3.
The most pure form of Vodka known to man. So pure that drinking it straight can cause damage to taste buds along with potential burning of the throat. Provides a drunk unmatched to all other vodkas. From the vodka kingdom known as Somerville, Mass. Won a triple-blind taste test, going up against all 'high-quality' vodkas.
Hey, do you want the best vodka in the world? Let's drink some RUBINOFF!
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4.
Dirt vodka made in somerville, Ma if u drink it u live in a box.
Look at that hobo he is drinking a nip of rubinoff. Lets go pee on him.
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5.
Horrible alcohol from Slummaville. Tastes like nail polish remover going down. Gives you a full body hangover and makes you feel like someone threw you down a flight of stairs.
I just drank some Rubinoff last night and now my head is exploding and I've had the shits since 4am.
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6.
6 bucks a bottle. high quality stuff hailing from lovely somerville. preferred beverage of poor high school students.
Dude I spent all my money on pot I guess I have to get rubinoff. Actually maybe I should just ferment my own urine since its basically the same stuff.
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7.
Famous Vodka from the Rubinoff Family. Originating in Tsarist Russia, the Rubinoff family name is lived on by Vladimir Rubinoff who, along with his wife Veronica, moved from Russia to Somerville, Massachusetts (USA). The Rubinoff family crest is imprinted on every bottle, allowing their name to live on forever.
The Rubinoff family was not the only family to leave Russia, as rival Dimitri Zarkoff also migrated to Somerville and produced Vodka for the New England region. The Zarkoff family was known for owning many of the buildings in Leningrad. Vladimir ended up sleeping with Dimitri's wife, Natalia. Dimitri would never forgive Vladimir for this action.
Cousin Cossack, a former Communist General, moved away from Russia following the fall of the Soviet Union. Cossack was known for the invasion and eventual takeover of Petrograd. He also moved to Somerville, and accordingly produced Vodka. There is a growing concern among the Russians that Cossack may try to take over Somerville and destroy the Rubinoff and Zarkoff family name, along with other minor factions in the region. A peace summit is being organized to bring together the Zarkoffs and Rubinoffs in hope to overcome their past so they can work together to stave off the threat coming from Cossack. Fellow Vodka maker James Caldwell is hosting the summit.
Oh, you are about to drink RUBINOFF? Do you know the history of the beverage you consume? The Rubinoff's and Zarkoff's have been fighting for centuries, but now both are vulnerable to Cossack, and his ilk! Promote peace!
LONG LIVE RUBINOFF!
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