1 Beer 15 Minutes Edit Meaning

1.

The act of consuming only one beer within fifteen minutes. This is the alcoholics supreme challenge. In theory, it is not possible for an alcoholic to drink only 1 beer at the bar within 15 minutes. The drink will last either 5 minutes, or will turn into three to four drinks within that 15 minutes, or they will give up and stay at the bar for extended hours.

The theorum has been tested generally during the hours of 2pm-3pm during work hours, or immediately following office hours, generally 5pm. The 2pm-3pm attempts are normally coordinated through instant messenger or email, and involve serious planning on leaving the office in increments to not appear suspicious.

note: 98% of the time, all participants of the Pittsburgh area fail.

<through instant messenger>

sparky: "the vpn is down again man. the goat must have chewed through the phone line"

Duds: "Bob's Place. 1 beer 15 minutes"

Sparky: "i'll gather the crew."

20 min later...

Crew member: "i wonder if they know we're gone??"

60 minutes later...

crew is still at the bar, with no intention on returning until 9pm, only to go people bowling in the kitchen with water bottles, while smoking cigarettes, and someone decides its a good idea to shread a roll of toilet paper all over the men's room