What is Scary Movie 3?
1.
The absolute best parody movie that I've ever laid eyes on.
It's basically a mix of a parody of The Ring, a parody of Signs, a parody of Eight Mile, and a parody of a whole lot of other movies.
George:
Now everybody in the 202, throw your hands in the air 'cause Fat Joe is through. Now everybody in the 202, throw 'em up! Check it out. I'm a white boy, but my neck is red. I put Miracle Whip on my Wonder Bread. My face is pale, nah, I've never been in jail. Me and Buffy spend every winter in Vail. How many bitches have I slapped? Zero. UH! And Martha Stewart happens to be my hero. I grew up on a farm and I was born with no rhythm, Dr. Phil's my uncle and I like to hang with him. I can't dance, I wear khaki pants, my middle name's Lance, my grandma's from France. So maybe I'm whack 'cause my skin ain't black, but you can't talk smack 'cause whitey just struck back!
2.
The funniest of the Scary Movie .... um, movies. It has by far the most bizarre, must-see alternate ending ever!
George: You guys ever wonder what it would be like to stop livin' up here
*puts hand up in the air*
George: and start livin' down here?
*puts hand down low*
Mahalik: Or what if we stop livin' over here
*puts his hand out to the side*
Mahalik: and start livin' over there?
*puts his hand to the other side*
CJ: Shit, my aunt Shaneequa used to live over there! But that bitch got evicted though.
Mahalik: For what?
CJ: Mice.
Mahalik: I thought she had rats?
CJ: No, rats are outside, mice are inside.
Mahalik: But what if a mouse goes outside does it become a rat, and if a rat is in the house, is it a mouse?
CJ: I ain't seen no mouse outside. That's what I'm sayin'.
Mahalik: That's because it's a rat, fool!
CJ: Damn! You mighta just made fact. That's some real shit...
3.
A hilarious movie paradying The Ring, 8 Mile and Signs.
Excerpts from Scary Movie 3:
(Underwater sounds) combing hair, lifts up arm and (MMMmmmmm…) combs hair from under arms.
A grassy cliff with a woman standing there. She spreads her arms open and leaps off like a star. Then, (krrrittt) “Oh SHit” hits the branch and rolls off finishing the suicide.
A man sitting on the well and then getting up after pooing, the well slams closed.
An upside-down chair spins with a weird noise as if taking out from a Mario game and a fat man comes out like he just got out of bed. He sits on it and gets warped like a roller coaster. After, a bucket magically appears and he vomits into it (arraaaaaaa, brrrrrraa)
Scene from “Are you mad”
Some weird “ooooooo” noises come from a room. The man gets up and goes in his daughter’s room.
“I can’t sleep”
“Well it’s way past your bed time”
“Why don’t you rock me to sleep in your big strong arms, there’s plenty of room under the covers.” “It’s going to be a hot night; you don’t need to wear pajamas”
“Where’s my daughter?”
“Are you mad I am your daughter.”
“No your NOT”
Pulls up the cover and a Michael Jackson jumps out. “AAAHH”
“ I swear, I didn’t touch her”
“ You liar”
“ Come on, she’s a girl…” says Michael Jackson.
"You sicko"
Starts dancing away, dodging the punches.
He grabs the man’s balls and the man grabs him back.
“A hahahahahaha”
Scene from breaking the curse
“We know what happened to you, what your mother did was wrong.”
“We can help you, Tabitha.”
Tabitha gets a surprised look on her face.
“Maybe all you need is a mother, ….. and a father.”
A close up view of her eyes depict tears. She lets go of the little boy and dramatic music is played while she glows and smoothly transforms into a real girl.
“Thank you all, your love has broken the curse and freed my soul, I’ll never have to kill again.”
“Really?”
Transforms back into a mutant
“NO, I’m JUST SCREWING WITH YOU”
Door flies open and she falls down the well as if she was diving.
