What is Shite Or A Haircut?
1.
(Scottish) To be completely confused, or to explain someone who cannot make up their mind. Also to describe a person or persons (organisation) who are completely disorganised.
"That's the 3rd time this month the council have dug up this road. They don't know if they want a shite or a haircut that lot!"
Alternativey - when observing a poor driver weaving all over the road and / or indicating the wrong way at junctions etc can be described as not knowing wether they want a shite or a haircut.
See
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