What is Sizzlean?
1.
(n) (used in Florida, possibly elsewhere in the US). Police officers who patrol on bicycles. So-called because they are presumably in better shape than their car-cruising brethren.
"Hide the piece, man, sizzlean's comin' down the street."
"It's hard to take sizzlean seriously when they're wearing those shorts."
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2.
This was originally a "bacon replacement" aka fake bacon. As such, it's also a term for security guards aka fake police aka rent-a-cops. It was originally used to describe the Las Colinas, TX security patrol. At the time, they were trying to un-annex themselves from the city of Irving.
Part of that initiative involved hiring police officers to "patrol". Since they weren't really a city yet, they couldn't really have a police force, so they had a security patrol. Since they really didn't have any authority, they tried to be "hard asses" and run off anyone they considered "undesirable". They patrolled most public places - shopping centers, parks, etc.
The "undesirables" included anyone under the age of 35, any pedestrian, anyone not wearing expensive clothing or anyone not driving a Cadillac or equivalent. God forbid you have a skate board or a bicycle.
Oh, look, sizzlean is patrolling again.
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3.
A security guard, especially one who carries no weapons.
Sizzlean is coming, hide your skateboard!!
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4.
If somebody has a really hot body, great style. Best used in describing yourself to your girlfriend!
"But Baby.. I'm sizzlean!"
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