Skid-mark Cobra Edit Meaning

1.

When a large king cobra slithers through the plumbing system and comes out your toilet while you are taking a dump. It pops its head up between your legs, so that the only option is to grab the back of its head to prevent it from biting you. Next you stand up and fish the cobra's tail out of the toilet and use it to floss your butt with long swift strokes, therefore creating elegantly long poop-streaks on the cobra's body. In addition to saving your own life, you have officially transformed a previously sleek snake into a skid-mark cobra.

What took you so long, did you fall in? No dog, I just braved death on the porcelin throne and ended up making a skid-mark cobra.