What is Southbury?
1.
The center of the stuck up homo universe.
I'm from Southbury. Not NYC, not Boston, not Hartford, and sure as hell no where in Jersey. The Bury. We don't have parkways or throughways here, we have one highway, and as far as I'm concerned - 84 is the only one that matters. We don't go to bars in highschool. We drive 65 mph to go to Cavanaugh's, that is, the "packy", not the liquor store, but the package store, and we make damn sure we get there before 9. We have expensive cars and we don't have stupid accents. We lock our doors when we go to Waterbury, ad we like nothing more than watching our Panthers own shit on Friday nights in the fall. We drink Starbucks here, none of that shit you brew yourself. We hang out at KMart and we enjoy a good party in the woods. We don't get bunked, hammered, smashed, or plastered here. No, no, we get FUCKED UP, and we're damn proud of it. If I don't like something, I'll buy a new and better one, because I'm richer than you. I'm from Southbury.
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