Spread The Butter

What is Spread The Butter?


1.

For those that are extremely ass-greasy on a constant basis, this is a term to be aware of. Keeping up with asshole hygiene is very difficult for some individuals. Sometimes, to remain dry and “scent-free”, there needs to be some improvising when toilet paper isn’t easily accessible. It would be easy just to drag your ass across the carpet like a dog but there needs to be a certain level of dignity kept. Common methods to wiping ones ass can include using the bed sheet while in bed, using the inside of your shirt or underwear that you are wearing, washing your ass with water in someone’s bathroom sink (although disgusting, the jerk didn’t have any TP!), or any other situation where toilet paper is substituted with something.

“I was greasier than all hell so I had to spread the butter with Joe’s ferret.”

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