What is Spunk-lard?
1.
Pre-coital lubricant of the anus made from the fatty deposits found in sperm. Method:
1) Collect ejaculated sperm whilst still warm
2) Bring to boil
3) Simmer whilst fatty deposits rise to top
4) Drain away liquid
5) Leave fatty residue to cool and congeal
6) Once congealed, sculpt into required shape (usually a cock-shape)
7) Apply to arsehole
Spunk-lard me up before butt-fucking me big boy!
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