What is St Austell?
1.
A Shit-Splat ex clay mining town in mid-cornwall, known for being in close proximity to the 'Eden Project'.
Strangely the largest settlement in the county of cornwall, although this is not apparent when walking down the boarded up and largely abandoned high street.
A large majority of the town is unemployed, and can be seen begging for skag money, fighting or Pram pushing in the town centre during the day.
Night life is reknowned for being violent and drug fuelled.. centred around the Puls8 nightclub. The area has very low levels of affluence, one area being the poorest postcode in England. (St Blazey, or 'Lazey'), Infested like many medium sized towns, by White Scum 'Gangsters' notably in the Par, St Blazey and Goever areas of town.
Once held two much loved tourist seaside resorts in the form of Carlyon bay and Porthpean, both of which have been destroyed and left as wastelands, the beach being cordoned off by inept local councillors, leaving even less jobs for residents of the town.
Known affectionatly by locals as
St Awful, St Shitstall, or Snozzle.
The way no one outside of Cornwall has heard of it.
Other cornish person:'Where you from Bey?
St Austolian:'St Austell'
Other cornish person: 'Oh.'
Penrice/Poltair/Brannel student with half a brain: 'When I grow up, I want to get the hell out of St Austell'
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