What is Steak And Blowjob Day?
1.
Celebrated on March 14th, Steak and Blowjob Day is a holiday for men, celebrated the month after Valentine's Day -- a holiday for women.
The idea is simple: no cards, flowers, candy or other whimsical gifts. Ladies (and gay men), you simply bestow your partner with a steak and a blowjob. Not necessarily in that order.
Dave: "Hey Bob, what did Sally get you for Steak and Blowjob Day?"
Bob: "Well Dave, that would be a big juicy steak, and a big juicy blowjob."
2.
A recently created and already widely known. This holiday for men is the equivalent to Valentines Day for women. Valentines Day is widely based around the pleasing of women we love, but now, a month later, these women we love can please the men they love. On Steak and Blowjob Day, every man's women will fire up the grill and cook them a big juicy steak that is just to his liking and then she will give him a big juicy blowjob, just to his liking. It can be in whatever order he wants, and when ever he wants.
Tom: Hey Bob, what'd Sandy get you for Steak and Blowjob Day.
Bob: What do you think man, a big juicy steak and a big juicy blowjob!
Tom: Nice!
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3.
Steak and Blowjob Day, as everyone should know, takes place the day before Valentine's Day. There is reason behind this, because it in fact benefits the woman as well as the man. Imagine, men, if you wake one morning to not only a blowjob, but the smell of steak. You might wonder, "What have I done to deserve this?" Then you are reminded, "Tomorrow is Valentine's Day! OH FUCK!"
I woke up and thought, "What is happening? Is someone burning a cow and raping me? Is this my payback for fucking my girlfriend's roommate last night?" It is then you realize, "TOMORROW'S VALENTINE'S DAY (as today is Steak and Blowjob Day)!!"
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