Stephenie Meyer

What is Stephenie Meyer?


1.

A thesaurus-raping whore who writes with the skill of a 13 year old teenybopper with an addiction to Quizilla.

Words Stephenie Meyer has ruined include:

Dazzle

Chagrin

Sparkle

etc. . .

See stephenie, meyer, twilight, bella, edward, breaking, eclipse, moon, jacob, vampire

2.

A professional fan fiction writer

Interview with Stephenie Meyer:

Q: So Stephenie, many fans are disappointed with Breaking Dawn. Tell us, what influenced some of the ideas present there?

A: Well, I decided to take 20 of my most favorite twilight fan fiction and compile them all into one story!!

See stephenie, meyer, horrible, terrible, disgusting

3.

Possibly one of the worst writers I've ever heard of. She is the author of a bestselling series called "Twilight" that was turned in to an extremely corny and poorly acted movie that was actually rather hilarious.

Read the first page of Twilight and you can tell that she uses a Thesaurus to replace boring words with random, non-flowing fluffy ones.

Her books also have no purpose what so ever though I will admit they are mildly entertaining especial if you read them to find their cheesiness.

The Vampire Academy is a really good modern vampire story (IMO) that you can read instead

Twilight Fangal- OMFG Stephenie Meyer is AH-MAZ-ING!

Me- Ugh Twilight was one of the most poorly written books ever.

Twilight Fangal- NO IT WAS NOT! LOOK @ TAHT GR8 VOCAB!

Me- If she HAD to use a thesaurus she should have at least made it sound more natural. *Burns book in disgust*

See twilight, edward, cullen, jacob, bella, shit

4.

see pedophile

the other day i was chillen with my little brother and stephenie meyer like kidnapped him and raped him

See stephenie meyer, kiddie porn, pedophile, pedo, twilight

5.

The author that has made the most epic fail in the history of English Literature.

Fail example 1: Vampires with no fangs and can sparkle in direct sunlight.

Fail example 2: No plot. No climax, only a build up of tension then nothing.

Fail example 3: Pedophilia between a baby hybrid vampire that "ages quickly" and a "shape-shifter" or "werewolf".

FINALLY...

Fail example 4: The whole characters seem similar to those of Charline Harris.

Twilighter #1: Lyk OMG! Edward Cullen is so great! These books are great! Stephenie Meyer iz great!

Twilighter #2: I kno rite! Im edumacated 4 readin such big books!!!! I wish he was real! Why did you do this 2 us Stephenie Meyer!! No ill nevr find a guy!!

Twilighter #3: I poured sparkles on all the guys in out class! YAY!

Twilighter #4: Thank god 4 Stephenie Meyer! Without her we would have died!!!!

.... It goes on and on and on....

See twilight, edward cullen, cullens, brainwashing

6.

A Stephenie Meyer is an egotistical, bored housewife who dreams up disturbing fantasies (some that could even be considered illegal) and makes lots of cash from it. There will be many (mostly illiterature and retarded) devotees of a SM's propaganda, and then there will be the more intelligent Anti-SMs. SMs generally write/talk about drivel that will go on for a long time, and some people will even consider the works of a SM quality fiction.

A Stephenie Meyer: Omg! Did u read my skript, init awsum!!! the main guyzzz soooo hawt!

Me: Can I be honest with you? It kinda sucked.

A SM: OMG!! U FUCKINN BEYACH!!!!!!1HOW DARE YA U R SO FUKIN TARDED I WIL KILL YA N GET MY VAMPZ 2 BITE YA!

See stephenie meyer, stephenie, meyer, twilight, new moon, eclipse, shit, rubbish, mormon, propaganda, bullshit, sparkly, vampires

7.

The worst "author" literature has ever seen. The creator of the Twilight saga in which the main character allows herself to be controlled and abused by her boyfriend. This is considered by fans as a "romance".

"Bella, you are not to see your best friend Jacob because I'm insecure and jealous of him." "Okay Edward, I'll abandon all my friends and family for you. You're better than them because you're pretty."

*Twitards swoon* "We love Stephenie Meyer!"

See stephenie, meyer, twilight, edward, bella


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