What is Stroudsburg?
1.
stroudsburg was mainly a town where there was woods everywhere and it looked so nice with all the trees,but suddenly over the past 5 years..its turned into a nightmare with all these new yorkers coming thinkin they're the shit.aning they have to cut down the trees and make more buildings and houses and a bunch of crap that no one needs. and don't even get me STARTED on how many furniture stores we have. you go past a furniture store and you dont see a single car in the parking lot. there was also NEVER a problem with gangs and all that crap, but now, my baby sister sees a gangfight while we're driving passed the raymore and flannigan furniture store. what has stroudsburg turned into? a mini new york.
stroudsburg sucks, but it grows on you and you gotta love it, especially if you've lived here most of your life.
lets just blame the new yorkers!
stroudsburg resident: damn..how many furniture stores are they gunna make around here?
other stroudsburg resident:gee..i dont know man. so far theres about 13 of them.
new yorker: stroudsburg sucks ass.
highschool kid: well then maybe you should go back to new york nigger!
news reporter:the new development has done damage to the creek near by. its foul sewage is ruining everything.
man watching news reporter: sonofa bitch!! you know what it is??! its these god damn new yorkers moving in here!
kid:damn...what the shit happened to all the trees?
other kid: they just made a god damn 9 story school for 2 grades.
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2.
A town in eastern PA you spend your entire childhood trying to leave but when you get out you miss it, and you've got no idea why.
You move, go to college or just wake up far away and you're like damn I miss Stroudsburg, not the town so much as the little things.
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3.
A simple abode of which is most likely to make all who spend prolonged amounts time in, subject to blowing their brains out with a very large gun. There is an abundance of cliques, such as skaters, drugees, drugee skaters, skater druggees, and ghetto skater drugees who arent really ghetto. The school system is terrible, similar to a bathroom stall in south korea on free laxatives day, most children are raised and born too moronic to get past an elephant poop shoveling job in the circus. There are no decent clubs, bars, or places for 40 year old perverted men (of which there are many) to have "fun". The only hangout for kids in Stroudsburg is the mall, which is the home of the movie theatre from satan's butthole. The only upside about Stroudsburg is Pinemere Camp, it is where loves meet, and best friends are made. Outside of Pinemere, any sane man would rather have a ram repeatedly shove his horns up his ass at full speeed then live there. It is one of those places where when your in it by force, you want out, but when u leave, you wanna go back and visit again and again, like when you smell a friends shoe, and although it smells like racoons recently had sex in it, you absolutely MUST smell it again.
*Talking on the phone between two best friends, one in Stroudsburg, the other on vacation elswhere*
Friend#1: I'd rather get dragged around a bed of coals with my head in a deers butt than continue living here.
Friend#2: Really!?! I can't wait to get back, i MUST get back to the soul-deteriorating pointlessness of that hellhole!
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4.
one of the most boring places on earth.. packed with new yorkers thinking they're tough cause they're from the "b.x." or somthin stupid, ive lived here my entire life and all i hear are these city kids complaining that its boring.. i always tell them that they should move back if they dont like it here, nobody wants them here and they're all corrupting the whole area.. stroudsburg used to be empty in the 90's but as soon as 9-11 happened they poured in. again nobody wants them, there is over 82% new yorkers or other city people in stroudsburg high school, it is packed. so please do all us natives a favor and move back "yo".
city kid: yo man, this place be dumb borin yo
stroudsburg native: shut up and leave then, stop complaining you cant always have it your way.
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5.
One of the most boring towns in Eastern Pennsylvania. Filled with '
Please, do yourself a favor, avoid Stroudsburg at all costs. Really.
6.
A shitass town in eastern Pennsylvania where pittbulls run free in residential neighborhoods.
Stroudsburg is a place where your palistinian neighbors let their pitbull run free in the community so it can kill your cats. Also here in the 'burg' you call the cops to do something about this neighborhood menace and they ask to see your dead cat. You show him your mawled kitten and then he proceeds to ask you where the dog is. You tell him next door. So he goes and sees blood all over the dogs face and then leaves. Everyday i walk outside this dog is in my yard. I keep telling it that there is no more cats to eat because she killed them all,but she keeps coming back.
Stroudsburg is full of fake ass thugs(wankstas)and wiggers. It sucks don't go you'll regret it.
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7.
Quite possibly the most terribly edjumuhcayted, crime filled small town in all of eastern Pennsylvania. Stroudsburg doesn't even have a real fire department, but it DOES have a 'volunteer fire department' which takes about an hour to get to a fire, but by then the house is a smoking pile of rubble. The police here are just freaking terrible. Also infested with
Visit Stroudsburg, get robbed, get hit by a car on Main Street.
