What is Target?
1.
A store that prides itself on working people to death. Clock in at Target and you have no idea when you're actually getting off, scheduled hours mean nothing. They have a bizarre alphabet-soup way of describing everyone's position that no one understands, and everyone in management is called some kind of "leader".
Yes, my leader! Yavohl, mein leader! Twenty people clocked in at Target last week and were never seen again, prolly still on shift cause the go-backs aren't finished.
2.
A place where they make you stay past 10:00 P.M. on weekdays, LODs like to take 30-minute 15-minute breaks, level ones get shafted out of everything, Target VISAs are ALL pushed on the cashiers, and level ones do more productive work than the higher levels who like to decorate the break rooms with needless decorations to celebrate someone giving birth to a retarded baby.
Target is very corruptive. When will the authorities see this???
3.
Known as a safe-haven for soccer-moms. Target is a company that loves to open up right across from
I am going to Target today because I need a television.
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4.
though its been said: target is for people who wouldn't be caught dead at wal-mart.
target and wal-mart both suck.
5.
Target is what Wal*Mart would be if it were run by Stalin. There's always at least 4 undercover security guards leering over you in aisles with items over 10 dollars in them. They might be inconspicuous if it weren't for the walky-talkies on their belts and the fact that they're in the store all day. The entrance is also manned by a 200 pound security guard in full uniform who looks more like someone from the National Guard, staring at all passers-by with arms folded and a tough-guy scowl. This gives Target a less friendly image than Wal*mart and is therefore a bit less popular, though the usefulness of such security makes up for what Wal*Mart loses from shoplifting and paying for the medical bills of the 90 year-old lady by the door whose hip was broken by teenagers trying to make off with a DVD player and a paintball gun.
The difference between Wal*Mart and Target is that you'll barely ever see any punk kids hanging out in front of a Target, because they get roughed up.
6.
Department store, competitor to Wal-Mart. Upscale-ness indicated by alternate pronunciation with a French twist on it.
I went shopping at Target.
7.
A shitacular store that tries to be the "Wal-Mart that never was", ie. "GREAT PRICES FOR GREAT FASHIONS". In other words 6 year old kids in Sri Lanka make ugly sweaters, then Target buys them for 10 cents and goes ahead and sells it under *insert famous clothing designer here* for $40.
Working there is HELL, you are forced to wear red shirts and khaki pants or skirts, call customers "guests" (if you don't you get written up), and every morning there are "huddles" (a stupid cutesy name for the word "boring meeting") where you stand around and they tell you "YESTERDAY WE MADE 100,000 DOLLARS AHAHAHA AND YOU'RE ONLY MAKING 6.50 AN HOUR FOR DOING ALL THE WORK US HIGHER UPS DON'T WANT TO DO". The store manager is NEVER there, and they are ALWAYS on vacation. Overtime is a no-no, and if you do one minute of overtime they have a hissy-fit and poop their pants over it.
There is also a stupid line EVERY "team member" (another cutesy fuckin' name for TARGET SLAVE) has to ask every "guest", and that is "CAN I HELP YOU FIND SOMETHING?". First off, most customers HATE being asked if they need help, secondly it's gramatically incorrect, and thirdly if you don't ask it and your GSTL/ETL/TL (stupid names for fuckin supervisors) catch you NOT saying it you get reprimanded.
Target gives their "team members" a discount that is a measly 10% off. Target's items are too expensive and you might as well walk your lazy butt to Wal-Mart and buy it for 3 bucks less.
Target Team Member Jonny: "Can I help you find something?"
Crabby overtly obese guest on cellphone: (in bitchy voice): "NO. WHERE ARE YOUR CHEETOS??!!"
Target Team Member Jonny: "Aisle G38"
Crabby Overtly Obese Guest on Cellphone: *grunts* "WALMART'S HEMORRHOID CREAM IS CHEAPER IM GOING TO WALMART *grunts again and farts*
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