What is Tear Jerker?
1.
To masturbate furiously while crying about your inability to get laid or the fact that you are just a pussy in general.
Fred struck out with all the skanks at the bar, so he went home to give himself a tear jerker.
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2.
A man who, while under the influence of alcohol or other mind-altering substances, masturbates and uses his tears as lubricant. A tear jerker may also be defined as a date or encounter with a woman which results in the afore mentioned definition.
This idea is referenced, but not directly named, in the popular film, "Waiting...".
A dialogue from the movie, "Waiting...".
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Dean: Calvin, what happens with every girl you're interested in? Nothing! You take them out, you pay for everything - you never make a move!
Monty: And then you go home... alone... to masturbate... while you cry... using your own tears as lubricant.
Calvin: Ok that was once... and I was drunk... and it was Valentine's Day.
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Calvin is a total tear jerker.
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3.
Someone who listens to Andrea Bocelli's "Time to Say Goodbye" while knocking one out.
It was a rainy Friday night, I was depressed, I spanked my hog while listening to some Bocelli, I'm such a tear jerker.
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4.
When a girl is giving head and stops before you're done, so you shoot in her, making her start crying.
She was going down on me, but didn't want to finish the job, so I gave her a tear jerker.
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5.
A man who, while under the influence of alcohol or other mind-altering substances, masturbates and uses his tears as lubricant. A tear jerker may also be defined as a date or encounter with a woman which results in the afore mentioned definition.
This idea is referenced, but not directly named, in the popular film, "Waiting...".
A dialogue from the movie, "Waiting...".
---------------- ----
Dean: Calvin, what happens with every girl you're interested in? Nothing! You take them out, you pay for everything - you never make a move!
Monty: And then you go home... alone... to masturbate... while you cry... using your own tears as lubricant.
Calvin: Ok that was once... and I was drunk... and it was Valentine's Day.
--------------------
Calvin is a total tear jerker.
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6.
Tear jerking is to masterbate while crying and using the tears as lube.
"Listen bitch, You are a cheating, lying, cum gargling swamp whore, so go home, cry your eyes out and use your tears to grease up your gristle knot while you masterbate yourself to sleep, It'll be a real tear jerker."
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7.
Making someone cry and then using their tears as lubrication to masturbate. Used to show pleasure taken from humiliating another.
Dude, Brian so totally deserved that tear jerker.
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