What is The Captain?
1.
- An upstanding term to describe a large bottle of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum.
- A man's penis
I called up The Captain and said "Please bring me my death in a gallon jug". The captain abliged.
2.
see also
"The Captain has arrived"
See
3.
A small fly with a big hat who features in recent
Favoured foods include cheese, sardines and turd snot pie. The Captain has no need for biscuits.
"Since when did farms need captains?" -
Weebl
4.
The name we called a kick who had a curved penis, see
"Did you hear about that kid?"
"Yeah his thing is shaped like a banana"
5.
Insertion of the pointer finger in the anus, inducing climax. Can only be practiced on males.
A little known fact, due to his debilitation from polio, FDR could only achieve climax through use of the Captain. (too soon?)
6.
Captain Tenneal (AKA The Skipper): A crucial character/host on the Most Extreme Elimination Challenge (MXC). He brings a necessary balance to the game by exploiting his authoritative role and using his philanthropic abilities in his dialog to improve the human condition (usually at the expense of the game's participants). His mental salvos of motivational verse can really light a fire under players, encouraging them to push on... bringing structure and continuity and to the game.
(CT)"... Well, what I'm trying to do is add a little levity because the tension is thick here between the meat handlers and the cartoon voice actors. Uh, let's meet some of the meat handlers. How many of you are filleters? And how many of you jerk your meat? Show of hands, how many boners here? Come on, somebody's gotta be a boner. And how many of you just like touching meat with your hands? Ok, well let's do some funny voices. You, chubby, get up. Come on, come on, stand up and do one of your funny voices..e on!"
(Man)- "Huhhuh..Well I'm a meat handler!"
(CT)- "I bet you are! Hey, give him a round of applause. Meat handlers, cartoon characters, we're all people huh? So what do you say we all race down to the starting line.
7.
A ponderous rogue that infuses the masses with the will to drink. Many compare him Captain Hook, but the latter could never live up to these alcoholic expectations.
"Matt, did you get your captain on?"
"Ughh... "(a groan because he woke up in his own vomit)
