Tinkle The Ivories

What is Tinkle The Ivories?


1.

(1) Play the piano.

("The ivories" are the piano keys.)

(2) Get ladies into a state of sexual arousal.

(Here, the reference is to the pale "ivory" tip or glans of the clitoris.)

(1) Every Friday night, Bill comes into The Old Ram and tinkles the ivories for half-an-hour, before the start of the darts match. Many regular customers join him around the piano in a sing-song and knees-up. A good, old-fashioned time is had by all.

(2) Nutwood Forest Naturist Association Rules:

(a) Gentlemen members must not appear in public with their male members in a state of erection. (Except for Mr Granville, who has been given special permission because of a serious medical condition.)

(b) Lady members who wish to remove the natural growth of hair which a generous God has given them on their intimate areas, must ensure that this does not reveal too much of their MOST intimate areas. (Mrs Plummer, the Undress Secretary will advise.)

(c) Ladies must not "tinkle the ivories" in public - either their own or those of other ladies. (Mrs Dalton, the Morals Secretary, will advise.)

We trust we have made ourselves clear.

Enjoy nature's bounty, in peace and tranquility.

Signed: The Committee

See music, harmony, sex, hood, horn, erection, glans, Persson


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