What is Tit Hammock?
1.
A cheap bra worn by horrifically overweight women in America. The sheer, elephantine mass of their saturated mammories has over-powered the 5 cents worth of Taiwanese twine pretending to be underwire and their hee-yuge boobs have come to rest together at the lowest point of gravity, creating a monoboob.
It looks like a pair of massively overweight and unshapely arms have been folded across the chest. Terrifyingly, these same women seem to adopt this position over the top of their already shudder-inducing globes.
There is a way to fix this problem, however. Take a large cardboard box, such as you might receive a new fridge-freezer in, cut a circular hole in the bottom and then another two circles on opposing sides. Place box over tit hammock owner.
Despite not correcting the fault of the $3.99 Kmart bra that was struggling for its life, it does mean that the rest of us don't have to look at it.
"Jesus-fucking-Christ, mate! Don't look left, there's a heffer wearing a tit hammock".
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