Ud Living

What is Ud Living?


1.

To incorporate Urban Dictionary rules into daily life, much like the ten commandments.

Example of UD living-

One night at the Cleaver house-

Beav- hey, Dad, can you give me a hand here?

Ward -Sure, Beaver, what are you up to, you little rapscallion?

Beav- I'm adding new definitions for Urban Dictionary, have you heard of it?

Ward- Beaver, you know I only look at porn sites and on-line gambling. Why do you think your mother and I named you Beaver?

Beav- yeah, Dad... WTF was with that anyway? Never mind.

Here's an entry I'd like to make:

Beaversnap-shoot rubberbands at a vagina and then take a dump.

Ward- is that a made up sexual act?

Beaver- I'm sure somebody made it up, I didn't read it in the bible.

Ward- sounds good, okay time to submit? All done here?

Beaver- Here's another one: George Bush- nonsense syllable.

Ward- you've got me by the short hairs there. I know we're supposed to reject nonsensical entries, and I'm pretty sure George Bush has been published before, but it is a celebrity. WTH, submit, little buddy.

Beaver-How bout this one- Beaver it's my own website, maybe I can pick up few subscribers for my MILF site of Mom doing Wally's friends.

Ward- We could use the extra income, but I'm afraid I can't go along with that one. We're not supposed to publish ads.

Beaver- right, we play by the rules. How bout this:

Johnny Bravo and the Shrimp Shack shooters, with Greg Brady and the Wonders?

Ward: No local bands, and friends names.

Beaver: You suck!

June: (calling from the kitchen) Ward, are you being rough on the beaver again?

Ward: Shut up, you whore! YOU'RE A GODDAMN WHORE!!! Ok Beaver, where were we?

Beaver: I was up to the word "nigger" I define it as lazy shiftless presidential candidate.

Ward: Get rid of the lazy and shiftless and you've got a definition. Remember, racist slur, but no racism.

Beaver: Gotcha! Hey I've got an idea, how about "Whore?" That could mean "homemaker in the neighborhood who takes money from neighbors kids in order to have sex."

Ward: Pretty good! I think you have to take the word homemaker out of there to get rid of the sexism. (calls into the kitchen) YOU DIRTY WHORE!

June: MAYBE IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE SUCH A TINY COCK!

Ward: SHUT UP, YOU WHORE!

Beaver: Dad?

Ward: Yes, son?

Beaver: Can I publish this? Jesus- a person I hate.

Ward: Can't see why not. It's your opinion. But remember, even if the dictionary allows for spelling mistakes, the Cleavers do not. IS MY DINNER READY YET, WHORE?

June: (calling back) IT'S AT THE GAYBAR WHERE YOU LEFT YOUR MANHOOD.

Ward: YOU FRIKKEN WHORE!!

See beaver, june, ward, wally, greg, castrato


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