Urbanist

What is Urbanist?


1.

An Urbanist is a former inner city inhabitant who aspires to live the life of suburbia, yet retaining many of his or her original customs, manners and beliefs much to the chagrin of their established neighbors. The clues that you are living near an Urbanist would be: the presence of used condoms in the parking lot; the placing of the telephone in the open kitchen window so that all neighbors hear it; screaming and yelling at multiple sex partners (on different days, of course). Also, a variant of the Urbanist is the far worst Urbanista, who will sign an apartment lease for 1 or 2 people, but we really know that their new dwelling is nothing more than a way station for their 20 and more friends, extended family and other terrorist cell members. You know an Urbanista is nearby when: roaches and other vermin suddenly appear; sandals are piled up outside their door; no furniture, but plenty of floor mats inside; the building starts to stink of food or human waste (what's the difference here, eh?).

Urbanist: That chicken head in apartment 11 is a real urbanist, never cleaning up the condoms in the parking lot.

Urbanista: Damn, tripped over those damn urbanista sandals again.

See urbanity


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