What is Zipperfinger?
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Taking whatever action is necessary to achieve a goal or avoid negative repercussions. The action is typically illegal, or at least, extra-legal.
"I didn't have any money, so I had to zipperfinger this case of beer."
"Professor didn't what to be giving out any A's, so you know I had to zipperfinger that grade."
"I was already in the back seat of the cop car, so I had to zipperfinger my pipe before we got to the station."
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Masturbation. Called zero-to-three because that's how many times you do it per day.
Alright guys, I'm going home to zero-to-..