Apocalypto

What is Apocalypto?


1.

A movie that reinforces the point that Mel Gibson is a nut who craves human blood. Features include a baby getting dashed against the ground till its neck breaks, a man's father getting his throat cut by the ruthless savages quite audibly (you can hear the cartilage) in front of him while visible spurts of blood run down his shirtless chest, a native person coated in mud, and the sacrifices, three sacrifices I could count watching it in fast-forward mode. The victims are rubbed down with a blue paint, then slaughtered. That's three realistic looking human hearts exposed to daylight and drenched in gorgeous crimson blood. It's too bad the native doesn't take a huge bite out of the cardiac muscle--but you can't win 'em all. At least twice the head is chopped off (kinda hard to see) and it's quite visible that the Homo Sapien head is thrown down the pyramid staircase and caught in a basket. The headless corpse is then thrown down the stairs later.

That throat cutting scene in apocalypto is the most realistic gashing of the human neck you will see outside of Al-Quaeda.

The ratings philistines probably denied Mel Gibson an extra scene in apocalypto where someone eats the flesh off a living human using a knife so that the last thing the victim saw as he died was his own kind eating his raw muscle tissue.

Apocalypto's sacrifice mode suffers from the Hide Your Children trope. The aztecs, Incans, and Mayans all sacrificed young children occasionally before the tribes were conquered.

See fetish, violence, pr0n, wallow, bloody, stabbing, heart, cannibal

2.

A film set to release December 8, 2006 about a young man that flees his home after being chosen for sacrifice in Ancient Maya. It is written and directed by Mel Gibson, which will probably turn a lot of superficial people off and on to the movie, even though despite popular beleif everything assosiated with Mel Gibson is not trying to force feed you Christianity.

Normal Person: Wanna see Apocalypto with me?

Hardcore Christian: Mel Gibson?! YESYESYESYES!!

Hardcore Atheist: Mel Gibson!? NONONONONONO!!!

See apocalypse, the passion of the christ, conspiracy theorists


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