What is Baby Growler?
1.
Noun - A tantalizingly attractive yet clearly unerage female human being. Similar to a piece of green fruit that still needs a little more time on the vine, the baby growler is often characterized by a lack of fullness despite a good shape and curvature. Your conscious says it’s not right, but the caveman instinct in you says grrrr!
Upon spotting a baby growler in public, feel free to growl while just out of earshot to alert other males in the vicinity of the presence of said baby growler. When spotted in public, the baby growler is often accompanied by a mother. If this is the case, feel free to growl at said mother as well, as she will likely also be attractive and worthy of procreative advances.
However, it is important to be on the lookout for the dominant male of the herd, as he is often fiercely protective of his baby growlers. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he knows what’s up. If he was you, he’d hit it. Be careful not to make direct eye contact with the male after blatantly eyeing up his underage daughter, as this can lead to fisticuffs. If the situation turns nasty and no police or Dateline NBC correspondents are in sight, gather with other males and charge the herd of growlers , mothers and the like, which will cause a stampede and allow you to pick off the young, old and wounded.
Good hunting.
Male #1: Grrrrr.
Male #2 (closet homosexual): Come on, that baby growler has braces and a Hannah Montana Trapper-Keeper.
Male #1: Grrrrr.
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