Conservative Party

What is Conservative Party?


1.

The second biggest political party in the UK. Has a right wing stance (think more moderate republicans). The party is slowly in a spiral of decline after an 18 year stint in power under the reigns of Maggie Thatcherand John Major.

The party has a reputation for being made up of solely boring middle aged men from priveledged backgrounds. This is statistically pretty true. The Conservatives are heavily supported by the tabloid that likes to think it is a serious newspaper: the Daily Mail which is mostly read by grey haired women that spend most of their time tending their middle class rosebeds and discussing the decadence of young people these days.

Above everything else the Conservatives believe that society is in decline and hark back to a nonexistant era when nuclear famalies and "respect for elders" existed.

Conservative Daily Mail reader A:Thank goodness for the Conservative Party! Those immigrants get on my euphemised body parts! When I was a girl we worked 25 hours a day and were beaten about the head with a brick if we were good! Now these immigrants have the audacity to take all the jobs people like me think they are too good for!

Conservative Daily Mail Reader B:It disgusts me that these people can come here without being a white prejudiced houswife just like me!

See labour, republicans, daily mail, boring, old

2.

The Conservative Party is fast becoming an irrelevance in Britains attempts to become a one party state. Most of their voters are over 68 years of age and will hopefully die very soon. Currently led by David Cameron, who is belived to have suffered severe facial burns as a child which gives him his shiny balloon face.

Most Tories (Conservative members) are upper class, too stupid to enter the family business, were educated at Eton, congenitally delusional, and have become the last remnants of Empire. However there remains strong support amongst the neuveau riche (trying to become like the above), and the xenophobic lower classes who wish they were working 'below stairs' cleaning shit off their masters shoes.

A: I think I might vote for the Conservative party at the next election.

B: Who?

C: Oh, I rememeber them! (then proceeds to assault B)

See conservatives, tories, scum, upper class, eton, etonian, empire, delusional


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