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When something is gayer then Hoobastank and owning a land-line telephone.
Brandon: "Hey Shane that song you sang me in bed last ni..
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A turnip tickler is a faggot/poof/queer/gay, I think you get it. Turnip being the metaphor for male genitalia.
Poof: Come here mate, I ..
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shut up; keep quiet
"hey I got a 20 bag in my coat, but keep shtum, i dont want any trouble from the fuzz"
See shtum, quiet,..