What is Crunchitize?
1.
A word used in Cap'n Crunch commercials that attest to the cereal's ability to stay crunchy in milk. The noble cap'n always manages to solve daily predicaments faced by children with the power of his crunchitization, taking the children to a world full of glorious artificial flavoring. It has nothing to do with anal sex.
Two children at a restaurant avoided a disgusting meal of es cargo (SNAILS!) when Cap'n Crunch flew his ship through the wall of the restaurant, much to the astonishment of the French waiter, and the boy and girl are elated when the cap'n crunchitizes them so they can enjoy a $1.99 box of cereal instead of a sophisticated meal at a restaurant that their parents worked hard to earn.
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2.
To ask for anal sex from Captain Crunch.
"Crunchitize us Cap'n!"
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