What is Harvard-westlake?
1.
A well-known independent high school in Studio City, CA. The student body is composed of about 1,500 kids highly invested in their education. Most students participate actively in extracurriculars such as the visual and performing arts, as well as athletic teams. In addition, each year, every student reaches out to the community to help those less fortunate. Harvard-Westlake is a tightly knit social community that has a reputation for a reason - most of its students are kind, dedicated, and worldly people.
Wow, you go to Harvard-Westlake. You must be smart
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2.
A super expensive private school with two campuses located in Studio City and Bel Air, that is surprisingly not for the rich and famous but for the rich and famous that have brains (although there are some exceptions to this rule).
It is mainly Asian but you don't see them or know about them because they're all in the library competing to see who's smarter.
It pretty much sucks if you don't care about having perfect grades and getting into Ivy League.
People for the most part are pretty nice, although they get shallower with the years. Everybody's pretty open-minded since there are so many races and religions in the student body that they don't discriminate (but they do make a lot of stereotypical jokes).
There are some students, like myself, that have gotten scholarships to HW for being "incredibly smart" even though once you're in there you see you're not so intelligent after all.
People like to exaggerate about how hard it is, but it is only hard if you're taking 6 AP classes out of 8 periods. They should really take it easy and enjoy all the drugs they can buy with all that money and stop calling people fat as an insult.
Me: "Dude, you look horrible. What happened to you?"
Fellow Harvard-Westlake student: "I only got 3 hours of sleep because I have a chemistry test today."
Me: "So you spent all night studying?"
Fellow Harvard-Westlake student: "I need to get a 100% or my grade will drop to an A-!"
Me: "That's the most ridiculous thing I've heard all day. I'm gonna take a year off at a public school."
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3.
An upscale private school in Studio City, California. The school enrolls grades 7-12. Tuition, which increases by thousands of dollars yearly, was around $23000 for the 2005-06 school year. As one might expect, based on the posh location and high tuition, around 95% of students are rich, white kids from the surrounding areas.
The education is top notch and students matriculate to some of the finest colleges in the country. Yet, this classroom excellence comes at the expense of personal development. On the whole, students are spoiled, arrogant, and snobby. Things are generally done well around HW, such as the newspaper and the drama department, but the sports teams aren’t too great, for the most part. Regardless of the reputation of their activity, participants think that it is awesome. It’s at “H-dub”, after all!1
Attendees and their families think that they are part of the best school in the universe which will ensure their success. Boy, are they wrong. My brother attended the school and never amounted to anything, but he sure thinks he is hot shit.
Students drive expensive European cars that their usually divorced parents buy for them. After all, they are entitled to only the finest. Certainly, HW kids love to make fun of other, less-nice parts of Los Angeles. They tell stories about what they think Mexicans are like, since their friends are overwhelmingly white. Harvard-Westlake is totally sheltered from the poverty which scars Los Angeles.
Harvard recruits a great basketball team each year, and as they take the floor, the largely white crowd cheers on a bunch of black boys given illegal, unethical athletic scholarships to the school. That’s how Harvard does business; win at all costs.
Parties are taken way over the top, in keeping with the rich, wannabe celebrity vibe. Major bank is plunked down for nice venues, and tickets cost a fortune. People gets wasted to the point of vomiting. At formal after-party in 2005, a student had to visit the emergency room for a serious injury she suffered while drunk off her ass.
Harvard Westlake represents everything that is wrong with Los Angeles. It is home to lots of stuck-up people who drive expensive cars to communicate to others how important they are. There is lots of name-dropping about who your entertainment industry daddy worked with on his last project. Keep doing what you’re doing, Harvard-Westlake.
"Gosh, I really liked those Harvard-Westlake kids at first. Then, I spent 20 minutes with them, and I realized how screwed up their priorities are."
"Word to your mother."
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4.
A school where one can find, in it's natural habitat, the elusive (and exclusive) Sluttus Lacostus (or mastercard whore). This species is characterized by it's astonishing lack of clothing, often exposing its buttox. When in mating season, the Sluttus Lacostus often develops a perplexing form of anorexia, often accompanied by even more shedding of clothing. One can sometimes lure the Sluttus Lacostus by standing perfectly still, covered in $100 bills and a "new hummer" scent. But novice travelers beware! Although the Sluttus Lacostus may look pretty and sweet, it will stop at no lengths to step all over you.
Yeah, I went over to Harvard-Westlake last week to pick up some fine booty, but I woke up two weeks later, in an alley, covered in blonde hairs, with "LV" sliced into my chest.
5.
A super-posh private school divided into two campuses: the 'Middle School' (consisting of grades 7-9) is located in residential Bel Air area, and the 'Upper School' (consisting of grads 10-12) is located in the fine Studio City area, of which I am a proud patron.
anyway, you will only be accepted into Harvard Westlake if you are one or more of these things:
~very very rich (bonus if you're jewish too)
~a product of a Hollywood mogul/empress
~unusually intellectual (as in a genius)
~you have a sibling who goes there
yes, Harvard-Weslake is for rich-bitches, man-hoars, child prodigies, and bloomind Hollywoodites. if you are any of the above listed, than you're pretty much on the Harvard-Westlake golden steamer choo-choo!
don't get me wrong, Harvard-Westlake isn't a bad school! in fact, going to Harvard-Westlake will give your parents plenty to brag about! it's the best private school in the friggin country!
just be warned, you just might catch the deadly 'Supahpreppyrichiesmartass' virus while in attendance!
worthy of note: if you are actually black and, like me, have been called names such as
Bobby Richboy: Yo' sucka I just got into Harvard-Westlake foo!!
Johnny Gangsta (who is actually black): Boy, you aint black.
Bobby Richboy: I'm practicin' fo Harvardizzle-Westlakizzle dizzle!
Jennifer (at Harvard Westlake): hey Lola! Do you think you can make it to Fred Segal this weekend? Daddy just gave me three thousand.
Lola: oh stop trying to act all rich, biatch!! you know you're only sore because my Daddy's yacht cost six million more than your daddy's yacht!!
worthy of note- I actually hearda conversation like the following in my math class with my own two ears.
BASED ON ACTUAL EVENTS-
Teacher: you won't be at school next week?
Student: no. my dad's taking the family to a press conference in Japan. Daddy's thinking of a merger with Sony.
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6.
An upscale private school in Los Angeles where parents can be seen donating multi-million dollar buildings in order to foster educations for their otherwise stupid-ass children.
Muffy: Where's little Tiffy attending school this fall?
Bunny: Harvard-Westlake. Isn't that great?
Muffy: Yes, but...didn't she fail out of elementary school?
Bunny: Yes, but Kenneth and I donated a couple million for a new gym!
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