Liveroulette

What is Liveroulette?


1.

A popular television GAMBLING game-show.

On LIVEROULETTE, the top prize every week is a free LIVER TRANSPLANT*.

(*Subject to availability.)

TV viewers are amazed, DAZEDand DORISSEDby the many other prizes waiting to be won, on the turn of the SPIN-CYCLIST's WHEEL:

- a case of GLEN SPORRANScotch Whisky

- a year's supply of QUIM NOVACAINE

- free PROPERTY-DEVELOPMENT ADVICE from experts

- a MANTELPIECE edition of the complete works of JACKIE COLLINS, bound in best BOCCA BEAVER-SKIN

- a set of SHERPA LUXURY LOW-LOADER luggage

- a framed reproduction of the famous LAUGHING CAVALIER painting

- an antique-style coin collection, including a priceless BLUMENTHAL HA'PENNYand a BRASS FARTHING

- a week's holiday in FRINTON and CLACTON

- two weeks in INVERNESS

- a BANANA BOATcruise at CANARY WHARF

- a day-trip to Box Hill in Surrey

- a BRAEMARTIANcountry weekend, with BASIL CONNOLLYand many other PHEASANT PLUCKERS

- a beach CLAMBAKE, with JOYLIDDON, ALICEWOADIE and the PEACHCOMBERS

- a conducted tour, by ZARATHUSTRA THE ROOSTER, of the famous FRONTAGEFACTORY in Yorkshire, UK

- an apt BEULAHmassage by a FRENCH POLISHER

- a season-ticket to THE OVAL

- a FLAPDOODLESaddress-book

- CHALICEand FAMILY PACKassortment- BOXES of SHIP'S BISCUITS, JELLIED EELS and FRESH MORNING ROLLS

- wild-life videos, featuring CORMORANT, MALLARD, GREAT CRESTED GREBE, SQUIRELLA and CRUSTACEAN

- cd audio collection of MEMORABLE FARTHINGALES

- TWO-MINUTE TANGO dance dvd set

- the CLOPPERTUNEand HANDEL'S LARGOsong-books

- many other books, including "DABCHICK AND GREBE DIETS", " HEIFERLUMPLOSE WEIGHT!", " CARROTTINGIN THE VEGETABLE GARDEN" and "MEAT RATIONS FOR EAGER VEGANS

- a made-to-measure ULTIMATE X pantry appliance

- exciting, surprise ELVIS PREZZIES from mystery donors!

See lumberjacket, curly wurlitzer, !, Persson


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