What is Napoleon?
1.
Military genius of Corsican origin, who unfortunately went on to lead France, of all places, to military glory- but after starting the first world war (1805, France vs. the world except america who went to war with the british over a matter unrelated to napoleon in 1812) was cast out of france, in defeat. returned in 1815 for the Hundred Days Campaign, ending in Waterloo, when he was once again cast out. this loss was not an allied victory, but a french loss, as they made more mistakes here than the rest of the war combined. Biggest mistake of his carrer was invading russia- 400,000 veteran soldiers sent to freeze to death and leave france unprotected. Thus is france today- Flat Coke- disgusting and worthless, but noce good and full of potential. Since Napoleon, France has been useless; when napoleon was exhiled, they traded their glorious flag of red white and blue, for just white.
Vive la France! o, Napoleon's not there anymore? Long live America! Washington's dead too? DAMN! Britain? DAMN IT ALL!!!
2.
Proabably the sweetest charachter ever. He has nunchucks skills, bowhunting skills and is pretty good at drawing animals and warriors and stuff. Hes also pretty good with a bowstaf.
deb: and here we have some boondaggle keychains a must have for the seasons fashion
Napoleon: i already made like infinity of those at scout camp
3.
Napoleon Bonaparte. The greatest military leader of all times. A hardworking, intelligent, charismatic, loved, feared, envied and never stopping, never sleeping, simple man who became emperor of France in the early 19th century.
Building the strongest army of all times, invaded Russia in a desperate attempt to aquire envious and lying Tsar Alexander's respect as a legitimate european Emperor, but failed despite his brilliant military understanding of battle winning and despite the fact that he suceeded in occupying Moscow and all the other cities he had reached, that had simply been evacuated or made useless by the russians, always trying to avoid battles (the russians winning the war by avoiding battle, one might say).
600000 french experienced, valuable soldiers, polish and other french-allied men, freezed, starved, marched and fought to death in an all-swallowing russian winter. But Napoleon, always among his soldiers, and drinking form their same cups and marching through the same mud (at least for a couple of meters), was still regarded as a great charismatic, and nearly mythical, living legend-like leader, worthy to die for and to fight for, even after the russian desaster.
The English Alliance (austria, russia, hannover, prussia) chased Napoleon from power through diplomatic skills, a strong army menacing to invade Paris, fuelling inner french oppositions, and favored by frances general weariness and tiredness of Napoleons restlessness and neverending wars and battles, as victorious they might be.
Napoleon was too much of a great caliber for them. He would definitely be too much of a demanding leader for us, today, because we're all psychology-reading and emotional-values-loving pussies.
May he be an example to all. May he rest in peace in the realm of glory.
(Did you know Josephine, Napoleon 's first wife, was half black?)
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4.
Scotch/Whisky (quality whisky at least)
Ice
*SPLASH* of soda
Huge fucking glass
Donnez-moi un Napoleon s'il vous plait.
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5.
A delicious pastry
Napoleon almost conquered Europe and all he gets is a pastry.
At least it's good.
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6.
A person who puts his penis in his own anus or in other words to screw himself over like Napoleon did when he sent his troops to die in the freezing weather of Russia
Wow dude,you got the girl prego? Nice job Napoleon...
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7.
A sex act in which a partner waits for the other to fall asleep, then recreates Napoleon's portrait where his hand is inside his jacket pocket by quickly jamming four fingers into the sleeping partner's vagina or anus. The offending partner then shouts "Avec non!" and withdraws.
"He fell asleep right after, so I hit him with a Napoleon."
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