Sailor's Wank

What is Sailor's Wank?


1.

The practice of numbing one's action hand, generally through circulation restriction or ice application, for the purpose of pseudo-auto-erotic masturbation.

I.e., it feels like someone else is doing it. Popular extensions include shaving and manicuring the hand to give a visual as well as sensory illusion.

So called due to the increasingly eccentric and imaginative masturbation aids that long periods at sea causes.

Seaman Staines: Ahoy! Why is there no ice in the freezer?

Master Bates: Because I just used it all to numb my hand and rub out a cheeky Sailor's wank all over your insoles.

and

Captain Jack Sparrow: Ahar, me matey. Where's me rubber bands for me hair?

Roger the Cabin Boy: Sup Jack. I took your hair bands for an extravagant Sailor's wank on the poop deck. I can offer you this delicious, creamy white conditioner in return?

See naval, sailor, wank, navy, posh


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