What is Thhs Asb?
1.
Commonly masquerades as an Associated Student Body - this, however, is a lie intended to lull the populace into a false sense of security preceding their violent take over of all of North America.
A group of people (term used loosely - some are demonic manifestations) hell-bent on torturing and persecuting the innocent subjects of its parent institution, typically employing loud yelling, irritating snack rallies, excessively loud and shitty music, offensive quantities of smiling, megaphones, balloons, excessive happiness, satanic rituals, etc.
They are likely to hunt down and survey specific innocent people when 2732 other people of equal surveyability are present immediately nearby.
Unlike other forms of pure evil, creatures of the THHS ASB cannot be warded off with holy symbols unless said symbols double as heavy bludgeoning devices. However, resistance is futile and all but the most awesome will be assimilated anyway.
Bob: Ahh! Help! The THHS ASB is coming! Run for your lives or you will be eaten-AAAAARGHHH! *choke gasp bleed gurgle die*
Joe: Holy shit! They ate Bob! Nooo! *is eviscerated on the spot*
Steve: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE PAIN! *is also eviscerated on the spot*
Humberto: Man, being eaten alive by the THHS ASB sucks almost as much as my name! AIIEEE! *is digested*
Jessica: Look at me, look at me, I'm blond, blue-eyed, a cheerleader, and popular! Look at me! ASB is great! *is tackled and knocked unconscious by a person that does not suck for being a THHS ASB supporter*
Captain: What happen!
George: Noooo! They're still coming! *has his extremities plucked off one by one by the THHS ASB while rusty nails are shoved down his throat by high THHS ASB officials* ARRGHAGHgrrrg *gurgle die*
The World: OH NOES!!1111one! Teh THHS ASB!!
And Australia was like: WTF mate?
