What is Tolkein Cock?
1.
Anything branded with the "Lord of the Rings" name for the sole purposes of making money off the hopeless nerd that will buy anything with "Lord of the Rings" on it and a price tag.
Made up exclusively by me.
Nerd: "Hey look at the new Return of the King game!"
Me: "Looks like just another box full of Tolkein Cock"
See
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A sexual euphemism for masturbation. Similar to flogging the dolphin, choking the chicken, etc.
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