Zanism

What is Zanism?


1.

Zanism is “act-ually” a religion formed in the early ‘90’s as an attempt to escape the tyranny of sanity without falling into the prison of insanity. We reject the sanity/insanity dichotomy and embrace “zanity” in its stead. Zanism is not a religion of beliefs. We believe in disbelief.

Zanism is influenced by some (not all) of the sayings of Buddha, Loa-Tzu, Jesus Christ, Niels Bohr, Warner Heisenberg, and Bokonon among others. To understand zanism, we examine why religion exists at all. Then, we capture that impulse--and squash it. You may think this is a joke, but we're as serious as Yorick’s skull.

After your conversion to zanism you're welcome to free yourself of it again and again unto infinity. In deference to Lao-Tzu, we like to think of Zanism as “the path that makes no sense.”

While zanism has no beliefs, it does have several tentative tenets.

1. On Belief: If you believe in zanism, you aren't a zanist.

2. On Earth: Treat the Earth as if you depend upon it.

3. On Salvation: Salvation isn't guaranteed.

4. On God: If there's a god, you're here to amuse her. And—she’s amused.

5. On Violence: We acknowledge that non-violence takes astonishing guts.

6. On Love: Just do it.

7. On Individuality: Dance dust dance!!

8. On Nonsense: Sense makes no sense and no sense makes sense.

9. On Hamlet: It’s a play on words.

10. On Hope: Refer to love.

See religion, philosophy, sanity, insanity, zane

2.

zanism is a political movement started by tim zanconato. It was created after zanconato became tired with chavs making hilarious puns on his name, and decided that something should be done.

The key principle of zanism is that anyone who is part of the 'chav' culture would form a new class, known as the whipped class. According to official zanism doctrine, the members of this class are not official humans. They would be forced into labour in order to look after the countrys production levels while other people can seek other employment. Another class would be created, mainly from former policemen, who would be known as the whipping class, whose job it would be to ensure that the whipped did not try to escape.

While this idea seems extremist captialism, another policy of zanism is that those who are not in the whipped class, or official humans, would all earn exactly the same amount.

Zanism is often ridiculed for having absolutely no other policies.

The chav massacre of 2006 was in the name of zanism

See weird, chav, political party, brilliance

3.

Zanism is “act-ually” a religion formed in the early ‘90’s as an attempt to escape the tyranny of sanity without falling into the prison of insanity. Zanism rejects the sanity/insanity dichotomy and embraces “zanity” in its stead. Zanism is not a religion of beliefs. Zanists believe in disbelief.

While zanism has no beliefs, it does have several tentative tenets.

1. On Belief: If you believe in zanism, you are not a zanist.

2. On Earth: Treat the Earth as if you depend upon it.

3. On Salvation: Salvation is not guaranteed.

4. On God: If there is a god, you are here to amuse.

5. On Violence: We acknowledge that non-violence takes astonishing guts.

6. On Love: Just do it.

7. On Individuality: Dance dust dance!!

8. On Nonsense: Sense makes no sense and no sense makes sense.

9. On Hamlet: It’s a play on words.

10. On Hope: Refer to love.

Zanism is the path that makes no sense.

See zane, taoism, religion, philosophy

4.

A religion created by a 14 year old girl who was frustrated because her beleifs didn't comply with any other religion. A Zanist (Currently 16 official Zanists) belives that..

1.There is no God.

2.There are spirits in every living thing.

3.There are ghosts.

4.There are unseen "mythical" creatures.

5.There are (of course) aliens, or life on other planets.

6.Humans and animals are equal beings.

7.Satan only exists in Humanity.

8.Violence toward some people is necessary.

There are also some simple rules to follow...

1.Take what you can get, But take nothing but what you need from the Earth.

2.Show Respect only to those who deserve it.

3.The World belongs to everyone. Do not pay for water, gas, or property.

4.Be Ruled by NO ONE.

5.You may celebrate holidays from other religions only for personal gain. (Christmas, Easter, ect.)

6.DO NO LITTER ON OUR PLANET.

note: Zanists are not peaceful hippies. We sin. We are evil, sadistic, vengeful people. But to the Earth which gives us life, we are not.

Paisley is a Zanist. (zanism)

See religion, life, earth, blah, blaher


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