as rough as old dog's titsas seen on tvas serious as canceras shallow as piss on concreteas shear follyas shitas simple as snowas sinas slippery as a butcher's prickas soft as a she-mouse's bellyas soulas stiff as an old man on a cold winter's nightas the actress said to the bishopas the coffin turnsas the crow fliesas the fuckas the world turnsas thoughas tired as a bag of beat dicksas tits